Yesterday wasn’t a good day for EU President Jean-Claude Juncker. After his State of the Union address, in which he promised Europe would actually do something at some point, the internet couldn’t help but take the piss.
His plans for telecoms over the next five to ten years were undermined by allegations of having a drink problem and his predecessor giving him grief. Jose Manuel Barroso accused Juncker of being discriminatory towards him and his new post-Europe employer, the paragons of ethics and forever golden-hearted Goldman Sachs. To cut a long story short Juncker opened an ethics probe after Barroso’s move to the city boys, which has apparently brought the EU’s integrity into disrepute, and the latter didn’t like it.
Next, Juncker and the EU came under fire as public perception of the institution begins turning sour following Brexit. A lot of comment spreading across the web suggests a growing number of people believe the European Union isn’t as democratically accountable as national governments. That was definitely the big sell for the Brexit proponents, and we all know how much Juncker loves a bit of Brexit.
Finally, Juncker was then exposed by a French publication following an interview in which he was questioned about his love of booze. During the interview, the reporter claimed he shook off any questions over his sobriety, while “downing four glasses of champagne”.
To help manage his rep, #TeamJunckerEU (*shudder*) decided to force the trend #AskJuncker upon the Twitterverse, so the good citizens of Europe can put their most pressing concerns directly to the man himself, or the intern who manages his social media account.
As you can imagine, Twitter did what Twitter does best: abuse. Some statements went straight for the jugular over Juncker’s telecoms policy, such as his plans for covering all of Europe with ubiquitous wifi for just €120 million. Other contributions ranged from straight up insults, to clever wordplay and puns, to expenses jokes and beyond. Suffice it to say that the perception of Brits being a bunch of cynics is entirely justified.
Some of it was downright offensive, as you’d imagine, but we’ll focus on some of the funny ones.
Wifi:
#Juncker reckons EU’s cities, towns and villages can be provided with universal wi-fi for E120 million. Wouldn’t even cover Luxembourg.
— Teacher Dude (@teacherdude) September 15, 2016
Train:
#AskJuncker
If one 1st Class #GravyTrain leaves Brussels @ 9am @ 80mph, & another leaves Strasbourg at 11am @ 60mph
Who claims most expenses— Ian James Seale (@IanJamesSeale) September 14, 2016
Bed & Brexit:
#AskJuncker If you come and stay in a British hotel, will it be a bed and Brexit?
— Rob Summerfield (@RobSummerfield1) September 14, 2016
Hinge:
The hinge on my arse has gone again. Should I see a doctor? Keith #AskJuncker
— Keith Mallender (@KeithMallender) September 14, 2016
Tuna:
Can I haz more tuna, please? #AskJuncker pic.twitter.com/NzeUz3GiE5
— BerlayCat (@BerlayCat) September 15, 2016
Ant & Dec:
Which ones Ant and which ones Dec? #AskJuncker pic.twitter.com/v1BsK2HC5T
— David M (@mercdavej) September 15, 2016
Respect:
I have to say I’m appalled by the amount of disrespect currently being displayed on the #AskJuncker hashtag. Not nearly enough.
— Article50 Guilt Trip (@LibGuiltTrip) September 14, 2016